The floods have lifted up, O Lord,
My anxiety arises and threatens to drown me, O Lord,
The floods have lifted up their voice;
The laundry/unfinished nursery/housework, take your pick, they are all crying out;
The floods lift up their waves.
All that needs to be done is about to overtake me.
The Lord on high is mightier than the noise of many waters,
than all the worries on my mind,
than the mighty waves of the sea.
they will not overtake me.
Your testimonies are very sure;
You have promised to be with me in everything. You have proven yourself to me time and time again. I know I can trust you to be with me even now.
Holiness adorns your house,
As you are with me, in my house, make it holy - set apart - for you. Bring peace in it, even when it seems like a stable. I know you can dwell - even there.
Oh Lord, forever.
Friday, November 4, 2011
Psalms from a woman's heart - Psalm 93:1
The Lord reigns,
He has it all together and under control.
He is clothed with majesty;
His inward control even shows itself outwardly. He is perfectly put together.
The Lord is robed in majesty
The Lord is clothed!! That is an accomplishment in itself for me somedays!
He has girded himself with strength.
He takes care of himself!! I don't have to clothe him or take care of him! How exciting! I have a relationship with someone who doesn't need me! I don't have to take care of him...at all!! He can take care of himself, and even more, He can take care of me!!!!
Surely the world is established, so that it can not be moved.
What freedom and peace. Thank you Jesus!
He has it all together and under control.
He is clothed with majesty;
His inward control even shows itself outwardly. He is perfectly put together.
The Lord is robed in majesty
The Lord is clothed!! That is an accomplishment in itself for me somedays!
He has girded himself with strength.
He takes care of himself!! I don't have to clothe him or take care of him! How exciting! I have a relationship with someone who doesn't need me! I don't have to take care of him...at all!! He can take care of himself, and even more, He can take care of me!!!!
Surely the world is established, so that it can not be moved.
What freedom and peace. Thank you Jesus!
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Psalms from a woman's heart - Psalm 84
The Psalms have been salve to my heart lately. I have been writing my prayers based on them at times. I will share a few of them here. I hope they touch someone else's heart as well.
How lovely is your dwelling place, O Lord Almighty! My soul years, even faints to be in your house.
Your house is place of peace. You are the most hospitable host. My home is a place of stress. Even when I try to rest in you in my home, I am constantly reminded of the things I need to do. The piles of laundry beckon. The half painted bathroom calls to me.
Oh how my flesh cries out for you the living God. In your home, life happens, and still is beautiful. In my home, life happens, and creates a mess for me to clean up. Each night, if I can muster the energy, I straighten up the day's mess. And still by 9:00 am the next morning, you would never know I'd tried.
Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself, where she may have her young - a place near your altar, O Lord Almighty, my King and my God. She does not worry. She knows you will take care of her. I also need not worry, you take care of me. But why then do I insist on worrying? Oh, blessed are those who dwell in your house; those who, trusting, have already made it. They know by sight, and they are ever praising you.
Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have their hearts set on pilgrimage. Lord, let my home, which is a disaster, become a place of peace. Please let your Holy Spirit hover over my home like he hovered over the chaotic deep. Bring life, and beauty from it. At the end of the day, please say that it is good. I need you to do this over and over, day after day, until I too rest in your house with those who have gone on before.
Lord, I need to know that you hear me. I need to know you care. I would rather be in your home. I'd rather be a servant in your home than running my own. I need for you to be the Lord of my home, and me just your servant in it. I can not run it on my own. Without you, I would need to find a rich man's job that pays a rich man's pay and despises the righteous man's values. I will not do that. I wait on you. You make each day new. Please, bring your spirit onto my home fresh and new each morning with the sun (even before the sun), and give me strength and protection for the day. I trust in you and I will walk in you.
O Lord Almighty, blessed is the man who trusts in you.
How lovely is your dwelling place, O Lord Almighty! My soul years, even faints to be in your house.
Your house is place of peace. You are the most hospitable host. My home is a place of stress. Even when I try to rest in you in my home, I am constantly reminded of the things I need to do. The piles of laundry beckon. The half painted bathroom calls to me.
Oh how my flesh cries out for you the living God. In your home, life happens, and still is beautiful. In my home, life happens, and creates a mess for me to clean up. Each night, if I can muster the energy, I straighten up the day's mess. And still by 9:00 am the next morning, you would never know I'd tried.
Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself, where she may have her young - a place near your altar, O Lord Almighty, my King and my God. She does not worry. She knows you will take care of her. I also need not worry, you take care of me. But why then do I insist on worrying? Oh, blessed are those who dwell in your house; those who, trusting, have already made it. They know by sight, and they are ever praising you.
Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have their hearts set on pilgrimage. Lord, let my home, which is a disaster, become a place of peace. Please let your Holy Spirit hover over my home like he hovered over the chaotic deep. Bring life, and beauty from it. At the end of the day, please say that it is good. I need you to do this over and over, day after day, until I too rest in your house with those who have gone on before.
Lord, I need to know that you hear me. I need to know you care. I would rather be in your home. I'd rather be a servant in your home than running my own. I need for you to be the Lord of my home, and me just your servant in it. I can not run it on my own. Without you, I would need to find a rich man's job that pays a rich man's pay and despises the righteous man's values. I will not do that. I wait on you. You make each day new. Please, bring your spirit onto my home fresh and new each morning with the sun (even before the sun), and give me strength and protection for the day. I trust in you and I will walk in you.
O Lord Almighty, blessed is the man who trusts in you.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
The Today Show
So this morning on the Today Show, they had an interview with a woman who had left her family in pursuit of her career. Apparently she is writing her memoirs of her experience. My heart was broken into a thousand little pieces. She went on a work trip to Japan for six months while her kids were still young. She enjoyed being known as something more than just a mom, and learned more about herself. That's all well and good. But when she got back she decided she needed to leave her husband and two kids in order to pursue her career. It was a conscious choice for her and it had to be all one or the other! That in itself bothered me, mostly because I am busting my bum to do both, and while I know I can't do both perfectly, I'm trying. And YES IT IS TAKING ALL OF ME. But that is the point. The one line of the interveiw that bothered me the most was wehen the mom was sharing about her point of decision/realization, she said that she woke up one morning and realized she had become the thing she did not want to become the most:"Someone who had given up her life for someone else"!!!!!!!!!
Now, I know that our culture can not understand the full Christian implications of giving up your life for someone else. I know that they don't see Jesus on the cross as the example. However, I had thought that there was at least some shred of value left of sacrificial giving! Soldiers, the man who threw himself down on his wife in Tuson, serving in poorer areas etc. She even has the nerve to write her memoirs about it and have it published. Her sons are now teenagers and very aware of what their mother has chosen. She says it makes her a better mom, because now the time she gets to spend with them is focused quality time. Not filled with all the other things of life. WHAT IS THE POINT OF PARENTING??? To bring children up to function well in REAL LIFE!!!
Once I heard her comment, I took Temperance's face gently in my hands and told her that I had given up my life for her and that I do it gladly!! Next week I will go to Beach Reach and be away from home and motherhood for a week. My heart already hurts to return to my sacrificial life with her and I haven't even left yet.
I'm sorry for my rant, but I'm just a bit shocked. I guess it's a bit of culture shock for me. I struggle just like every other woman over the sacrificial nature of motherhood. Some days I don't want to do it. But for someone to get up on TV and be applauded for throwing off this life in favor of selfishness is shocking to me. There would be no human race if all women chose to do this! It is our call to give sacrificially. It is a way God draws us to the cross. I guess I should not be surprised that our culture rebels against the cross. It just breaks my heart.
Now, I know that our culture can not understand the full Christian implications of giving up your life for someone else. I know that they don't see Jesus on the cross as the example. However, I had thought that there was at least some shred of value left of sacrificial giving! Soldiers, the man who threw himself down on his wife in Tuson, serving in poorer areas etc. She even has the nerve to write her memoirs about it and have it published. Her sons are now teenagers and very aware of what their mother has chosen. She says it makes her a better mom, because now the time she gets to spend with them is focused quality time. Not filled with all the other things of life. WHAT IS THE POINT OF PARENTING??? To bring children up to function well in REAL LIFE!!!
Once I heard her comment, I took Temperance's face gently in my hands and told her that I had given up my life for her and that I do it gladly!! Next week I will go to Beach Reach and be away from home and motherhood for a week. My heart already hurts to return to my sacrificial life with her and I haven't even left yet.
I'm sorry for my rant, but I'm just a bit shocked. I guess it's a bit of culture shock for me. I struggle just like every other woman over the sacrificial nature of motherhood. Some days I don't want to do it. But for someone to get up on TV and be applauded for throwing off this life in favor of selfishness is shocking to me. There would be no human race if all women chose to do this! It is our call to give sacrificially. It is a way God draws us to the cross. I guess I should not be surprised that our culture rebels against the cross. It just breaks my heart.
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